Get your Wiffle on…

Get your Wiffle on…

OK, so you may not consider Wiffle Ball a serious sport. I mean, if you even know what Wiffle Ball is, you probably think it’s just a distraction tool you can offer your kids on a summer day to get them out of the house for half an hour before someone steps on and breaks the plastic hole-filled ball or decides the skinny yellow bat makes for a better sword (or light-saber) than it does a bat, and starts cracking the other kids over the head with it (and usually leading to someone bending it over their knee to end the attack).

And all that is certainly true, but there’s also a serious side to Wiffle Ball. No, really! Wiffle Ball is played “for reals” across the country by grown men in serious leagues. In fact, there’s a local Wiffle Ball League hosted by the City of West Memphis, and there’s some serious Wiffle Ball action right across the bridge in Memphis, including the massive “Wifflestock” event each October.

So, before you snicker when I tell you about my recent exploits on the Wiffle Ball diamond, keep all that in mind. Also keep in mind that any exercise, even if it’s “just” Wiffle Ball, is good exercise.

So, my buddy and co-worker, Chuck The Sports Guy, and some of his friends decided last year to start playing Wiffle Ball. Just a quick tutorial: Wiffle Ball is almost exactly like baseball, except everything is plastic. The bat is a skinny plastic (usually yellow) tube. The ball, plastic and white, is full of holes on one side, which can be used to throw super awesome curve balls and such. The field is about the size of a T-ball field, and with the smaller playing area, you really only need three guys to make a team (and really, you can get by with two if you’re good).

Now in some Wiffle Ball games, you don’t even run the bases. You just get hits based on how far the ball goes or you get out. But we run the bases! So, beyond that, the only real difference between baseball and Wiffle Ball is, you can hit the runner with the ball (called pegging) to get them out. And, honestly, in that regard, Wiffle Ball is superior to baseball. I mean, can you imagine how awesome it would be in the Major Leagues if Yasiel Puig could simply fire a rocket in from the outfield and “peg” a guy out trying to score?

Anyway, there’s also no catcher. A square-ish board or other device, roughly the size of the strike zone, sits behind home plate. Any unhit ball that strikes the board is a strike. Any swing and a miss (and it’s harder than you think) is also a strike. There are no walks.

So, last fall, after some of the guys got busy with other obligations, I started playing with Chuck’s crew in their league. At first, I just treated it as a goof — something to do to get a little sweat going or whatever. But then I realized that these guys were really into it, keeping stats and won-loss records. I mean, Ted Williams was a great hitter and all, but I batted like .730 in limited action last year (although I did give up 7 home runs in one game while pitching).

So this season, I was all in from the beginning. The team captains had a draft, Chuck drew up some rule changes, and we started playing about a month ago. And like I said, for just some dudes who decided to start playing Wiffle Ball, it’s pretty intense.

We’re well into the season now. In fact, the playoffs are around the corner. We play up at Brunetti Park and we’ve pretty well staked out the southwest corner as our ball field. So, if you see us out there, just know, it might look like it’s only a bunch of big kids out there running around like fools on a hot summer afternoon, but for us, we’re in the middle of the pennant chase, and the World Series is on the horizon.

Play (Wiffle) Ball!

Ralph Hardin is the Editor of the Evening Times. He lives in Marion with his wife and kids… and isn’t too bad a Wiffle Ball for a 42- year- old man.

“Marion State of Mind” By Ralph Hardin