I feel like you’re not taking this seriously

I feel like you’re not taking this seriously

Why are you always trying to stir up trouble, Michael?

I recently moved to another part of town, but for 18 years, I drove past that Patriot-themed water tower every day, and as a Marion graduate, I have always enjoyed seeing that red and blue artwork on the gleaming white tower rising above the landscape.

OK, I’m being a little overdramatic here, but it’s a cool water tower, and I’m all for giving it some attention. Why you insist upon dragging poor, beleaguered Main Street West Memphis and it’s water tower art project into this is beyond me… What, are you trying to see how many people you can make angry all at the same time? This ain’t “Our View,” Michael!

Now, don’t confuse one thing with the other either, Michael. The price tag for rehabbing a fully-functioning water tower that needs to be refurbished and the price tag for turning an old out-of-use antique water tower into an art project are two different things. It’s a municipal public works repair versus a city beautification project. It’s not apples to apples, Michael. To borrow from “Pulp Fiction,” — Ain’t no #$& @ ballpark neither… It ain’t the same league. It ain’t even the same #$& @ sport.”

Did you actually call the guy who is doing the tower art project “the northerner,” Michael? What is this, the Reconstruction? You might as well have called him a carpet-bagger! Maybe you should start using “scalawag” to describe me instead of your favorite go-to…

“Liberal!”

The truth is, just to paint the water tower, even if it was just one solid color, is probably going to cost about half-a-million dollars. I’m pretty sure that was the price point for the City of West Memphis a couple of years ago when they repainted the big Mid-America water tower. Now, that’s a massive water tower, so it might not be that much, but it is going to be pricey.

But you know what, Michael, I’ll play your little game here. Let’s say we really do want to go all-out on this water tower. I’m all for it. Thousands of people visit the Marion High School campus every football season and for other activities. If they have something cool to look at to form a mental connection with our community, then there’s nothing wrong with that. Let’s have some pride!

Now, I don’t want to get into this whole West Memphis water tower art project deal here. We have both made it known that we feel like that money could have been better used elsewhere, but it’s not either of our jobs to make those kinds of decisions. And you know what, it might actually be cool to have the tower all decorated and lit up. I’m all for anything that add some nice aesthetics to that part of town, so let’s see what kind of bang Main Street gets for its 241,000 bucks.

Maybe it’ll be the cornerstone of an East Broadway revitalization effort. Of course, it might also become the cornerstone of thieves stealing pieces off of it for scrap or vandals defacing something because that’s just what vandals do.

But for real, though, if Marion is going to spend some serious money on the water tower, let’s spend some serious money on a good idea. I mean, if they want another Patriots logo, that’s fine, but what about a panoramic reenactment of the Sultana disaster? A wraparound design with the boat burning and folks being rescued out of the Mississippi River… with fancy spotlights and a short-range radio message you can sit in your car and listen to!

See, Michael, I’m on your side.

By Ralph Hardin