‘Quit writing down those numbers’
‘Quit writing down those numbers’
Man’s unique gambling strategy lands him in jail
news@theeveningtimes.com
“Am I not a compassionate judge?” asked Judge Fred Thorne of West Memphis District Court on Friday.
“Yes, you are,” answered Mr. Coleman, the deputy prosecuting attorney.
“There are people from other counties that say I’m not. This is the saddest part of the day for me. Every Monday and Wednesday I clear out the jail. Today I have 15 misdemeanors and 9 felonies. I am an employee of the state. It doesn’t matter if there are 20 in jail or one.”
A man in jail was charged with his dog running at large and failure to appear.
“How do you plead to your dog running at large?” “Guilty.”
“And failure to appear?”
“No contest.”
“What happened with your dog?”
“I was just walking him.”
“Where is the dog now?”
“The city has him.”
“Your dog killed another dog. I wish I could outlaw all pits! $85 plus court costs on the running at large and $105 plus court costs on the failure to appear.”
A man in jail was charged with driving on suspended and pled no contest.
“I was real nice to you on your charges. Why didn’t you go to the Justice Network?
“I didn’t know what that was.”
“45 days jail.”
A man in jail was asked by Judge Thorne, “Why were you out at midnight drunk?
How do you plead to public intoxication?”
“Guilty.”
“Where do you live?”
“West Memphis.”
“Why were you in the middle of the intersection drunk at midnight?”
“I was just stupid.”
“Jail, let him out at noon tomorrow.”
A man in jail charged with driving on suspended pled ‘nolo.’ “Lady that works at the Foot Locker — yes you!
Stand up. What were the pled option I gave to everyone?”
She stood up and said, “Guilty, not guilty and no contest.”
“That’s right! He pled ‘nolo.’ That means he has been in the system before or he wouldn’t know to use that pled. Why were you driving without a license?” “I got a job and was just going back and forth trying to keep my job.”
“You have had lots of previous charges. I’ll just start at 2013 when I came into office.”
The judge then read off a list of his previous charges before rendering his decision “$500 plus court costs and 10 days jail.”
A man in jail was charged with loitering and pled guilty.
“Why were you writing down people’s tag numbers?”
“He uses license plate numbers to run the dogs and plays their numbers,” said a man in the galley.
“You know him?” asked Judge Thorne.
“Yes, sir.”
“Do you make any money playing those numbers?”
“No.”
“Jail, let him out at 5 o’clock today. Quit writing down those numbers and remember them in your head.”
A man in jail charged with no seatbelt, driving on suspended and failure to appear pled no contest to all charges.
“Why didn’t you come to my court?”
“I was locked up in Forrest City for two months.”
Judge Fred Thorne “We are going to call and see if you were locked up. I will either dismiss the failure to appear or you will get 30 days jail. Sit down while we call.”
A man in jail owed $505 to the court. He pled no contest.
“You haven’t made a payment since April. Why not?”
“ I’m paying off all my tickets.”
“You have had 17 violations. How old are you?”
“22 years.”
“Pay $350 today and get back on a payment plan or do 13 days jail.”
A man in jail was charged with domestic battery. He pled guilty.
“How old are you?”
“41.”
“You have got a heck of a record. How long were you with that woman?”
“Two years.”
“The report says you were intoxicated and hit her in the eye and your were drunk?”
“Yes, sir.”
“You have had previous alcohol problems and previous battery charges. $500 plus court costs and 90 days jail. You women will take any man if he is breathing!”
A man in the courtroom charged with driving on suspended pled not guilty.
“His trial is set for Aug.
30th,” said Mr. Coleman.
“You have another charge of driving on suspended and a court date?”
“Yes. That trial date is Sept. 12.”
“You pled not guilty on that one too. You have obviously said to hell with the court system!”
A woman charged with driving on suspended also pled not guilty.
“Some shade tree attorney told you to pled not guilty. I usually give house arrest but when you come back for trial and are found guilty I will give jail time.”
Two men were called up at the same time.
“How do you both pled to public intoxication and disorderly conduct?”
“Guilty,” said both men.
“How are you related?”
“This is my brother-inlaw,” said one man.
“You were at the Waffle House drunk?”
“We had been to the casino and we don’t remember being in the Waffle House.”
“I think the problem came when you were both going to the bathroom in the parking
lot.”
One of the men covered his eyes in shame.
“$350 plus court costs and 30 days suspended each.”
“We bonded out at $750 each.”
“You will actually get some money back,” said Judge Thorne. “What did your sister say about this?” “She wasn’t as bad as my wife was!”
After a couple of men for review came forward and had not finished their community service, a young man was called.
“Did you complete ‘your’ community service?”
“Yes.”
“What are you doing with your life?”
“I’m in the 12th grade. I want to be a body repair man.”
“Good! I wish more people would go to trade school. If you wreck your car, you can fix your own car. Have a good day!”
By the Evening Times News Staff
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